Disbelief

I knew that living in England would not be a year-long cocktail party. With the dismal exchange rate, I knew that by coming here I was resigning myself to a year of penny-pinching and miserly stinginess.

But I never thought, not even for a second, that I would find myself buying budget Doritos.

Yes, Sainsbury’s brand, “Cool Flavour tortilla chips: Flavoured Mexican style maize snacks.” They almost make them sound ethnic.

Rather than an exotic Mexican delicacy, they taste like someone took Cool Ranch Dorito seasoning and sprinkled it over chip-like forms made out of crusty toenails.

Next time I’ll skip the Doritos and go for something the British can’t screw up, like digestive biscuits.